Top 10 excuses why I have not blogged for a couple of days…
10. Went on a top secret mission to figure out how in the world Russia could break facebook.
9. Had a secret rendezvous with Brad Pitt. Angelina found out and locked me up in her basement. With her kids.
8. I was busy looking for World Peace at the mall.
7. Aliens abducted me and took me to the mother ship. It was nice hanging out with them again.
6. The heat in Austin melted da internets.
5. Started reading Atlas Shrugged and fell asleep for days. Again.
4. The Mayor of Pottsville threw me in jail and demanded money.
3. The twitter bird carried me away to lala land.
2. Spent days waiting for a Postcard from Wildwood.
1. While working on my top secret Pay it Forward project, I accidentally glued myself to the wall.
So what's your excuse? Do you have an innovative excuse for not blogging? Talk to me...
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9 comments:
Want to hear more about those aliens!
I would like to clear up a possible misconception of Excuse #4. Accommodations at the Pottsville jail are rated 4-star. Scriber, like many other freaked-out or burned-out bloggers come here and rent a cell where they are assured 3 square meals a day and round-the -clock supervision to protect them from themselves. Here they can enjoy a wholesome game of ping-pong, or participate in the watermelon seed spitting contests, and play mindless card games until they are, at last, rehabilitated and can return to the blog community. Thank you, Mayor of Pottsville. PS All available cells are now booked and reserved, we are accepting reservations now for April, 2010. If you think you might have a nervous break-down, please plan ahead.
Similarly, I should like to clear up any possible misunderstandings regarding Excuse No. 2. Here at Wildwood we pride ourselves on speed of dispatch and delivery, and on the quality and suitability of all our Postcards.
@Scriber...
1) I hope the Russians are leaving FB alone. Otherwise, I'm attacking them.
2) You carry on with your rendezvous with Brad. I'll handle Angie. ;)
3) I carry world peace with me. We can't share it with others because it doesn't make business sense.
4) Which aliens? The nearby ones from Zupton or the ones from across the galaxy? The Zuptonians stink too much so I don't like them much.
5) I'll send you some heat-proof internet from India. (It'll be waterproof too.)
6) Why didn't you simply shrug off the sleep? :|
7) I'm applying to the Mayor to give me a place in April 2010, after reading his list of facilities available.
8) Yes, I remember looking up at the sky and wondering, "Is it a bird, is it a plane?"
9) Did she send it by US Mail? I must ask the FBI to stop messing around with mail.
10) Why didn't you activate the transmitter planted in the filling in your tooth? It would've sent a signal to 23 rescue centres around the world, who'd have immediately rescued you.
Nope, no excuses here :)
Russia broke Facebook? YES! Now I have an excuse for not updating my wall for the past 3 days. I mean, um, oh, drat! Sorry to hear that....
Styzer: Thank you for visiting and commenting! Contrary to the rumors that aliens torture you, these aliens fed me bon bons and chocolates. They told me I was too thin and gorgeous. I wanted to stay there forever but unfortunately I woke up...
Mythos: I must say that the accommodations are rather nice. You could use some cooking lessons though:)
Janice: Where is my royal mail? Where is it? I am so crushed!
Sumit: Haha!
1. Please tell the Russians to leave Facebook alone! And go nowhere near twitter. How rude!
2. We have a deal.Must warn you... Angie is handful though.
3. Ha ha. Too funny! Do share some world peace with us!
4. These aliens are from Zephora. They don't smell bad at all. They are great looking and always tell me how thin I am and how gorgeous I am. Everyone needs a day or two to hang out with them:)
5. Thank you for the heat proof, water proof internet. Can you please make it Russia proof too?
6. Ha ha. You are too funny! But I think I am just going to shrug off the book. I mean surely it would be ok?
7. You may want to give him some cooking lessons. He needs them.
8. It was me! It was me! The twitter bird carried me away!
9. She lives in another country so it must be international mail. Or it could be the fact that she does not have my address. I think she must have sent it to "Scribers Web USA" Unfortunately, like David Hasselhoff, I am more popular abroad than in US. No one knows me here.
10. Phew! Next time, I'll remember that!
:)
Nicole: You've got a whole bunch of stuff going on in your world. You don't need crazy excuses:)
Carol: Yes Russia broke facebook. You need to write about that!
Our chef at the Pottsville Jail appreciates your feedback. In fact, he no longer serves burnt eggs with raw bacon.
Hi Scriber,
I just want to ask you if I can meet these aliens. I want to go live on their planet and just listen to them all day long. It would be so nice to hear them say those things.
Thanks for the visit. And so glad I found you on Crone and Bear It.
God bless.
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