Saturday, August 16, 2008
HOOT: Husband Out Of Town
List of things that went wrong while my husband was Out of Town:
Day 1: A baby gecko mysteriously appears in my kitchen sink. I scream, grab a broom and knock on all the neighbor's houses. No one answers. I come home, chug some wine and slam my broom around. The gecko gets trapped in the broom, I scream and run to my backyard. I hurl the broom on to my patio and slam the door. The gecko dashes to the wilderness. I scream. I chug some more wine.
Day 2: In the middle of the night, I hear a thundering noise in my kitchen. I grab a kitchen knife that I keep at my bedside, turn on all the lights and dash downstairs screaming and shouting. Turn on all the lights in the kitchen. The automatic ice machine in my fridge broke and was venomously spitting out ice. At me. I turn off the icemaker. I cuss at the fridge and clean up. No sleep that night.
Day 3: Da flat tire.
Day 4: It is 8:30 in the morning and there are lots of flies mysteriously clinging to the ceiling in my house. Very eerie. Must make some more friends today and move in with them until the husband comes back.