So I've decided to get some plastic surgery done.
I know I've told you that I look exactly like Demi Moore but the reality is that I look more like Meg Ryan. Without the blond hair, blue eyes, and the duck lips. Or the cheek bones. Or the freckles and skin tone. Other than that, we are this close!
I want ducky lips. And cheek implants and a face lift. And who could not use a nice little tummy tuck?
Unlike User's wife who went to South America for this, I will be going to India to get this done. An old friend of mine is a doctor there and has promised to get me hooked up with the right peeps. He also promised to be in the operating room during the whole procedure. So I will be in good hands.
When I told my Aunt, who is a doctor, about it, here is how the conversation went:
Me: So I am going to India sometime to get some work done.
Aunt: What work?
Me: You know... face lift... this and that...
Aunt: Are you crazy? (lecture... lecture.... lecture... One would think that since she lives in LA, she would be more open to this. But nope....)
Me: I am also getting a tummy tuck... I got a buy one get one free deal... You want a free tummy tuck?
Aunt: Really? I am so in. I could use a tummy tuck!
One problem solved.
I also told my hubby about it. Now I am going to try very hard to articulate his reaction without being biased.
- Hysterical Laughter
- "How much is this going to cost us?"
- Repeatedly saying, "you are beautiful as you are"
The last sentence could have influenced me if he had not started laughing hysterically again.
I haven't told my boys about my decision yet. But they'll find out sooner or later.
And ask me:
Mom! What happened to you? You look like you have a very bad allergy reaction!!! You look like you are really sick!!! Did a bee bite you on your lips? Did you eat peanuts? Take allergy medication and go to bed. You look really really sick!
Wish me luck! I hope I don't end up looking like Joan Rivers!