Thursday, April 30, 2009
Recently there was a party in town and I wasn't invited.
One day I went to mail the collages to the gallery during lunch. What is supposed to be a 2 minute drive turned into a 15 minute drive. Why?
There were cops everywhere. I mean over 50 cops. On motorcycles, in cars. They were all waiting on the road talking on their walkie-talkies. No one knew how to drive with 50 cops watching them. We were all scared to death. We all drove at 1 mile an hour speed. People actually stopped driving on the shoulder and stopped at the yellow light. Wow.
My friend Carol was with me and we knew something was going on. It couldn't be an accident.
Those of you who don't know, I live in Austin. Celebrities are everywhere.
Was Jessica Simpson getting married?
Was Andy Roddick having a wedding reception?
Was Dubya (Bush W.) in town?
Was Laura Bush getting a mani-pedi?
Were the Bush girls in trouble again?
But no. It certainly seemed bigger than that.
I was with Carol and we saw tons of black SUVs rushing past us. And they were all heading towards one direction.
Micheal Dell's house. His house. Yep the Micheal Dell lives somewhere across from my work. He was having a lunch party. And no one invited me.
So we went and mailed the artwork and grabbed some lunch. On our way back, we saw even more cops. I was driving and terrified of crossing the white line on the road.
I came back to work and asked a coworker if she knew what was going on. She knows what's happening in town. If she doesn't, she can certainly find out.
Turns out the Vice President Biden was having a little fund raiser at M. Dell's place. I know this for a fact because... Oh well... Just trust me on this one. It is a conclusion based on research and what we saw.
Sandra Bullock does not use this much security. Lance Armstrong is just a dude in town. Everyone who lives in Austin already has an autograph from him and leave him alone. It had to be a politician. And Mr. Biden was in town.
So Mr. Biden if you are reading this, use the helicopter pad next time. OK? And invite me to the party. I can be the life of the party. I swear I'll squeeze more money out of the folks.
And Mr. Dell, invite me next time. I have a faux press pass and a decent camera. I used to work for you and I am a loyal stockholder. Call me!