Wednesday, December 31, 2008

No No No!!!

An alert reader brought this to my attention so I had to share this list with you...

Top 10 things not to do at an office holiday party:

  • Wear too much makeup. I mean Tammy Fay kinda makeup. This applies to men too. Only rock stars can wear eyeliner.
  • Wear skimpy clothes and let the girls hang out. For men, unless you are working for a rapper, don't show up wearing rapper clothes with a ton of bing. Nope. Not attractive. Reeks of mid-life crisis.
  • Carry ziplock bags and stuff it with goodies. Don't pretend it is for the dog. No one will believe you.
  • Flirt with a coworker in front of the spouse. I mean how stupid is that?
  • Ask anyone if they are pregnant. Including men.
  • Do the macarena on a table. Period.
  • Have a make-out session in public when everyone knows you are married with children.
  • Puke.
  • And last but not least, don't use empty wine bottles to fill them up with the beer so you can take it home. Trust me. Someone will catch you. On camera.


mythopolis said...

Even coming from a male point of view, I find myself in agreement with these guidelines....with one exception. From a "purely aesthetic" standpoint, it is my studied opinion, that a shapely woman in skimpy attire offers the eye much welcome relief from the urban world of lines and grids and cubes. : ) Happy New Year!

Jodi said...

That is hysterical! Rules to live by!!

Happy New Year my friend!!!!
Have a great day!

Stephanie said...

Well Said!
Happy New Year!

Nicole said...

I am with Dan on this one.
But usually the girls that wear these outfits are the ones that later scream sexual harassment. LOUD.
So, let's better get that eye candy somewhere else. That's safer ;)

Nicole said...

Ohh, dooh, and a happy new year to you as well - with plenty of exclamation marks ;)!!!!

Scriber's Web said...

Mytho: Oh Mayor of Pottsville, I think it is completely ok for you to want that for aesthetic purposes. It is also OK for women to flaunt their assets. But let's all be conservative at work parties. Work is work:)

Jodi: So glad you liked the guidelines. Have a great day my friend!

Stephanie: Thanks for providing the photo! This is the first photo I've published on my blog that I did not take:)

Nicole: I actually had one guy complain to me about a coworker who wore low cut shirts and revealed her boobs at meetings. He said it was distracting and sexual harassment. The woman was over 50 and had no idea about this. She wasn't flashing intentionally. Thank God I wasn't the manager who had to deal with this situation!!!!!

Betty said...

OMG! I couldn't stop laughing. But all these points are very true. I can't believe the way some people leave the house.
"Ask anyone if they are pregnant, Including men." That is going to be a timeless one.

Oh and the filling the wine bottles with beer was crazy. LOL!
Great post.